CUPSI Qualifying Slam: most intense shit ever.
Reading the Old Man and the Sea: I read half of it the other night, and now I want to go fishing. I need to finish reading it, I love it.
Reading The Bible: My favorite part was when they cut all these different animals in half, and then stuck the halves on top of different halves.
Watching the Vagina Monologues: There was a giant plush vagina on stage that actors crawled in and out of. It was all velvety, I touched it.
Watching the Office: Jim has returned to his rightful place! Huzzah!
Getting Really Good at Understanding Charades-Esque Pantomime: I kinda rock now
Not Writing Poetry: Gahhhhhhhh
Eating Banana Bread in Bed: Is there really any other way?
Discovering the Difference Between Buffalo and Bison: There is one. Who knew?
2. PajamaJean Pants
As I have yahoo email, my home page is set to Yahoo, as well. My favorite aspect of this arrangement is that I always am subjected to Yahoo News's brilliant articles. Instead of coverage of global, political, and economic affairs like any normal, less dignified news source would do, Yahoo knows that real news sounds more like "Kristen Stewart has a mullet!" or "Worlds largest potato found." This week, one of the most important news bulletins of all time: the rising trend of PajamaJean Pants.
That's right, boys and girls-- PajamaJean Pants, a garment that looks like jeans but feels like pajamas! How has civilization existed so long without them? As if the concept of making casual wear even more casual isn't alluring enough, just think of the potential of a piece of clothing that not only coins the stellar combo word PajamaJean, but also tacks a Pants onto the end for extra clarity. Hell, why don't we call all jeans "jean pants?" I think new wave of overly redundant clothes titling is on the way. We can revolutionize the English language one piece at a time; next up are Necklace Jewelry and T-Shirt Tops.
Lastly, I'm sure everyone is just as excited as I am for pants that both fit awkwardly and feel unexpectedly stretchy when rubbed up against on a busy sidewalk. They are like the Snuggie for your legs.
PS: Apparently a legging-jean hybrid exists as well. They are entitled "Jeggings." It is knowledge such as this that really makes me wish my occupation was naming new inventions. I also wish that I wrote the disconcertingly sensual cookie descriptions on the backs of Pepperidge Farm products. In fact, I have visited the Pepperidge Farm website in search of an application for the position of "Cookie Porn Writer," but couldn't seem to find one. If anyone knows how I might go about landing this dream job, please let me know.
3. Who wants to take me to Broadway?
Paging through Vogue yesterday, I found an article about the production of Arthur Miller's A View From the Bridge starring Scarlet Johansson and Liev Schreiber. There are so many reasons why I need to see this show. Some of them are as follows:
-I just read this play a couple weeks ago, so I'm all excited about it.
-My playwriting professor, who introduced the play to me, was also Liev Schreiber's acting professor when he went to Hampshire. There is a photo of her at the premier. Hugging him.
-Scarlet Johansson. 'Nough said.
-I never get to see professional productions even though I love them more than pretty much anything else ever. Except maybe PajamaJean Pants. Those are tough to beat.
Love,
GennaRose
Where in the bible do they mix and match animal parts?
ReplyDeleteWish I could take you to Broadway. Maybe Crystal knows a secret way to get inexpensive tickets, or maybe you could suggest a school trip for your class...